FUNNY INTERNET AND COMPUTER JOKES
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Funny jokes about IT
A conversation by a representative of a personnel search company and a candidate: - So, Mr. Abha, you say that you are a software engineer. Do you know Microsoft Office? - If you give me the address, I will go there, Sir. Jokes about IT - Active life I was once living very actively - playing football, tennis, participating into car races. Sometimes I would play poker and pool. But later somebody stole my PC and that was it... Jokes about IT – Forum’s rules Internet forum rules: 1. Come 2. Ask something 3. Get banned 4. Go & Google it Funny jokes about IT - A programmer goes to a shop A wife sends her husband - an IT programmer - to the shop to buy a sausage. - If there will be brown eggs, take 10. A programmer goes to the shop and asks the seller: - Do you have brown eggs? - Yes we do. - Then give me 10 sausages. Funny jokes about IT - Life - You know, I have Google+, Facebook, Twitter, Skype accounts... - Man, and do you have life? - OMG, No! Could you send me a link? Funny jokes about IT - In the toilet A Man from the toilet shouts to his wife : - Darling, darling, do you hear me?!!!! - What happened, did you run out of toilet paper? - No, restart the router, please! Funny jokes about IT - sms (text) messages Every mobile phone user has complained like this: Don't text me while I'm in the middle of texting you, because now I have to change the whole text. Funny jokes about IT - Google facts Funny facts about Google users: 50% of people use Google well as a search engine. The rest 50% of them use it to check if their internet is connected. Funny jokes about IT - Broke my heart A guy tells his friends: - The girl I was dating broke my heart, so I broke her Apple iPhone 5. You all know who cried more Jokes about IT - Frozen windows A wife send her husband an sms on a cold winter evening: "Windows frozen". The husband send answer back: "Pour some warm water over them". Some time later husband receives answer from his wife: "The computer is completely fucked now". Jokes about IT - Keyboard Keyboard not found... Press ENTER to continue... Jokes about IT - Password Man and wife together is setting a new password on their computer. Man enters "My_penis" and his wife fall on the floor laughing out loudly after computer answers: "Too short..." Jokes about IT - Tetris Computer specialist is walking down the street when suddenly the brick fall down on his head. - Stupid Tetris!- thinks computer specialist before losing consciousness. Jokes about IT - Beautiful girl Talking two computer specialists: - What do you do when you see a beautiful girl? - Asks the first one. - I download her. Jokes about IT - Vodka and IT Capacity of vodka in IT style: 0.10 l - demo version; 0.25 l - trial version; 0.50 l - personal edition; 0.70 l - professional edition; 1.00 l - network edition; 1.75 l - enterprise; 3.00 l - for small business; 5.00 l - corporate edition; Bucket of vodka - extreme edition; Sea of vodka - global edition; Homemade vodka - home edition; "One more" - Service pack; Kefir in the morning - Recovery tool; Appetizer - plugins; Beer - patch; Coca-cola, fanta, 7-UP - trojan viruses. Jokes about IT - IT specialist Who is IT specialist? The person who solves a problem you didn't know you had and in a way you don't understand. Jokes about IT - Samsung computers Sales representative of Samsung computer department tries to persuade an officer of a Russian city municipality to purchase computers: - Don't worry, computers will never substitute officers: no company has yet created a machine that would do nothing. Jokes about IT - Price drop At computer shop the staff is changing laptops prices from 4000$ to 2000$. A man passes through and asks: - Tell me, why they are getting so much cheaper? - Because Christmas sales is over! Jokes about IT - Empty You don‘t truly know your car until you know exactly how far you can go, after the gas gauge needle passes the E (Emtpy). Jokes about IT - A command A guy prepares to demonstrate voice control of a computer. - Silence, please, I will now demonstrate how easy voice control works. A man from the back of the room: - Format: C. Enter. Jokes about IT - Query - What a freaky query - thought the database and stopped working. Jokes about IT - Operating system A client calls to hotline of internet service provider: - I have a problem, internet stopped working two days ago, neither I nor my son nor anyone else can access it now.. - I see, do you know what's the operating system on your PC? - Of course I do - it's Facebook... |
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