FUNNY JOKES ABOUT WOMEN
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Funny jokes about women - @ the psychologist
At the psychologist: - My wife does not like that I snore... - So what would you like to get rid of: snoring or your wife? Funny jokes about women - Birthday A husband asks his wife: - Darling, what would you like for your birthday? - I don’t care as long as it has automatic transmission. Jokes about women - Hates you? - Is it true that the family of your love hates you? - It is true. His wife said she is ready to strangle me with her hands. Jokes about women-Yawning A yawning man demonstrates his impoliteness, a yawning woman – her capabilities. Jokes about women - Thoughts Husband to wife: - Darling, I have to confess you that when I’m having sex with you, I sometimes think about other women. - Oh you bastard. When I have sex with other men, I always think about you! Jokes about women - Love - Do you love you wife? - Of course, she isn’t worse than other ladies… Jokes about women - Logics There are two ways to understand the logics of women. Unfortunately, none of them works. Jokes about women - Fortune-teller A lady comes to fortune-teller, who can read palms. - Will anyone marry me? - No. - But you haven't even looked at my palm. - I see it from your face... Funny jokes about women - Secrets I am now sure that women know how to keep secrets. In groups. With 40 other women. Funny jokes about women - I'm leaving you - I’m leaving you... You’re constantly sneering at my overweight... - But honey, what about our kid? - What kid? - So you are not you pregnant?! Funny jokes about women - Knowing woman Question: How do you call a woman who always knows where her husband is? Answer: a widow. Funny jokes about women - Eating 75% of women do not eat after 6... shots. Funny jokes about women - Women's brain Strange thing about women's brain, there's nothing right in left side, and nothing left on the right side Funny jokes about women - Three words I left three notes scattered around the house for my girlfriend. They say "Will", "You" and "Me". That will keep her busy whilst I watch football on TV. Funny jokes about women - Understanding them Don't you ever try to understand women. Women understand women and they hate each other. Funny jokes about women - Three kinds Wives can be only one of three kinds: 1. Pretty, but unloyal. 2. Loyal, but ugly. 3. Pretty and loyal, but inflatable. Funny jokes about women - Talent I am very talented: I can open the wardrobe, put my clothes inside and close the doors before they start falling out. Funny jokes about women - Pretty I'm too pretty to work! Funny jokes about women - Normal I tried being normal once... It was the worst 10 minutes of my entire life. Funny jokes about women - Talking If you think I talk too much, let me know. We can talk about it. Funny jokes about women - Goose and pig A lady goes into a bar with her goose. Then the bartender comes up to her and says: - Why did you have to bring a pig in with you? The lady answers: - Excuse me, I think this is a goose. And the bartender says: - Excuse me, I was talking to the goose. Funny jokes about women - Gynecologist The girl went to gynecologist. Undressed, opened her legs. The doctor says: - Above! The girl picked up the legs above. The doctor says: - Above! Girl picked up even higher. The doctor already screaming: - Above! Girl: - Well where I can higher? I can't anymore! Physician - Gynecologist office upstairs! Here is hairdresser! Funny jokes about women - Luxury The man tells his friend: - My wife wants me to take her to some luxurious place. I think I could take her to petrol station for gasoline... Funny jokes about women - In bed Man writes an sms for a woman: - And how are you in bed? Receives an answer: - I am ok ... fit in. Funny jokes about women - Not afraid - What are you doing? - I'm walking. - But it's dark! - I'm not afraid. - Very brave? - No... Very ugly. Funny jokes about women - Beggar Wife: I hate that beggar. Husband: Why? Wife: Yesterday I gave him food and today he gave me a book "How to Cook"! Funny jokes about women - Wine A wife and a husband sit in the room and enjoys a bottle of wine. Suddenly the wife says: - I love you. Husband asks in surprise: - Is that you or wine talking? - This is me, I'm talking to wine. Funny jokes about women - Fridge Why married women are more fat than single ones? Single women return home, take a look what's inside the fridge and go to bed. Married women return home, take a look who's in bed and turns to fridge. Funny jokes about women - Four legs Wife comes home late at night and quietly opens the door to her bedroom. From under the blanket she notices four legs instead of two! She reaches for a baseball bat and starts hitting the blanket as hard as she can. Once she's done, she goes to the kitchen to have a drink. As she enters, she sees her husband there, reading a magazine. -Hi darling, he says, -Your parents have come to visit us, so I let them stay in our bedroom. Hope you have said hello to them. Funny jokes about women - The will The will of woman is an order, the will of man - a criminal code. CHECK WHAT IS A JOKE OF THE DAY TODAY!
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